Do not trust this cat

Ladies and Gentlemen, I am extraordinarily angry. Imagine my shock, and quivering rage, when I checked Amazon the other day (as a kitty is wont to do) and found this:

http://www.amazon.com/Making-Rounds-Oscar-Extraordinary-Ordinary/dp/1401323235/ref=pd_ts_b_27?ie=UTF8&s=books

The thief! Not only is this puffy-tailed loser a stealer of lives, he has also stolen my byline and propelled himself to Amazon fame on the false claim that he is extraordinary. Well, that is if you consider hanging around a nursing home and predicting that people will die - sort of like predicting that there will be drunks about on St. Patrick's Day - extraordinary. If you do, I feel bad for you. If, on the other hand, you are looking for the absolutely true tales of a genuinely better than ordinary cat, then you have come to the right place. Do not be fooled by this Oscar - that's probably not even him on the book cover. And if you are taken in by his lies of extraordinariness, just remember, he only comes around to wait for you to die. That's right. He is a harbinger of death. Is that, my friends, what we want to call extraordinary? I don't think so, but of course, I am biased. I would also like to add here that if I ever catch that cat hanging over my bed I will KILL HIM; that's right, I will turn the tables on you, you furry grim reaper. Watch your back; this is one thing you won't see coming.